Facing My Past - Part One

Saturday was the "Big Day" I got ready and although I thought that I looked good, I felt every one of my forty-four years. Kissed the kids good-bye with strict instructions not to re-enact the glories of Nero's Rome (instead of fiddling while the house burns, it would be accompanied by flute and clarintet). Honestly, I should note, that have good kids, but the threat of immenient disaster always proves to be a viable excuse to leave any event I found boring.

So, I got in the car and started the hour drive to the reception. Then, I started thinking- why was I having such a strong reaction to all of this? Then I began to think about some of the people that I would be seeing and started to .remember that part of my life. Taffy- The Post College Years. The self-centered, getting all the goodies I could (house, car, stuff) Taffy. We were all the same way. We had nothing, needed everything and wanted more than that. Plus, life was "FUN, FUN, FUN"- hitting the bars, the weekly Bears game at someone's place-an afternoon of drinking laughing and FUN, FUN, FUN- cookouts and trips, my yearly Christmas party-all a blast. Then something happened....

My dad died suddenly at age 56. Next week I will blog about Dad, but suffice it say that we were very close. If you knew me, you knew about my dad. Several of my friends met him when he came to visit. His death devastated me. I was lost, and in unspeakable pain. I came back to Chicago after the funeral to nothing. Not a word, a call, a card from these people. Even when they saw me weeks later- nothing. There were still outings and parties but I wasn't invited becuase they seemed to think that sadness was contagious-and, of course, I wasn't FUN,FUN,FUN anymore. So I moved on and now, here I was about to come face to face with what I called "The Arrested Development Crowd"

Turns out there weren't half as many of them there as I expected. One who was there, was a woman that I would politely call the college tramp. She did not disappoint in her red halter dress. Lady, you are 45 and no one is interested in seeing that much of you! Another couple from college was there. Three years ago they moved from the area to Massachusetts. The wife lamented that while they were "Someone" in their Chicago suburb they were no one in their new town. (Insert eye roll here).

And on a note of deep personal disappointment-NO CANADIAN!!! Damn.

So, I gave my best wishes to the bride and groom. Danced with the best man - an old friend whose wife just left him, taking his sons, too. Then citing the long drive home, left at about 9.

That was part one of facing my past. In November I will be facing part two and I am really looking forward to it. Last week my high school boyfriend's wife emailed me. She and hubby are coming to Chicago for a long weekend and they want to get together with me! I haven't seen EBF since I was 17 and think it will be a hoot to do this. I think the Taffy Teens Years are more memorable (in a good way) anyway.