Dad

This Monday, October 23, would have been my Dad's birthday. How old would he have been if he hadn't died 13 years ago? If he were here and you asked him, Dad would have paused and then taken out his wallet to check his driver's license and figured it out. That was the great thing about him- he was truly timeless. Today I am trying to conquer the difficult task of writing about him.

I guess I should start with the fact that my Dad was larger than life. He was 6 foot 9 inch. In the late 60's when I was young this was uncommon. He would get stopped every so often by people who wanted to know which basketball team he had played for! Dad played in high school but his bad knees (which I inherited) prevented him from continuing. Once a man could not be convinced that Dad didn't play in the pros, so Dad finally said, "Yeah, I played a season for the Knicks but quit because of bad knees." The guy replied, "I remember you playing in the Garden!"

Being larger than life, I always thought that my Dad could protect me from everything bad. That no matter what, if he was around things would be okay. He was someone I could always talk to- he never seemed to judge.

Dad loved to cook and was really good at it. Well, except for the time he made rice for my mom, her sister and himself. He looked at my aunt when she came for dinner and said, "Do you like rice?" Aunt Gerry replied, "I can take it or leave it." Dad told her that tonight she was going to love it since he had made half the box!

Dad also enjoyed a good cold glass of milk, some oatmeal cookies and the New York Times.
I wrote awhile ago about something that I lost that I would like back. I should have added that I wish that I had kept the Valentine's Day bag that he made for me in second grade. He took a white ice cream bag that was lined in foil and decorated it with dollies and hearts. It was the envy of the class. What made it special is that he made it.

Oh, I need to tell my favorite Dad story. He lived at home while he attended Providence College. He stayed out until 6 am partying and on his way home he stopped off and picked up the newspaper. As he was walking up the stairs to the family's second floor apartment, he met my grandfather (on his way out to look for Dad) on the stairs. They stood there looking at each other for a moment and then Dad said, "I couldn't sleep, so I threw on my clothes and went out and got you the paper." He then handed my grandfather the paper and walked into the apartment where he promptly collapsed on his bed. Grandpa said nothing- Dad was home safe....and he got the paper.

He loved antiquing, cooking, and being with friends. Here is a picture of the two of us (you finally get to see me!) on New Year's Eve, 1986.




How I miss him!! Things have never been the same without him. I miss out phone calls, the holidays spent together- the laughter, fun- the whole thing.







I found this song on a youtube tribute to John Spencer. It fits so well-






In many years they may forget
This love of ours or that we met,
They may not know
how much you meant to me.

I cried for you
And the sky cried for you,
And when you went
I became a hopeless drifter.
But this life was not for you,
Though I learned from you,
That beauty need only be a whisper

Without you now I see,
How fragile the world can be
And I know you've gone away
But in my heart you'll always stay.

I cried for you
And the sky cried for you,
And when you went
I became a hopeless drifter.
But this life was not for you,
Though I learned from you,
That beauty need only be a whisper

(I Cried For You by Katie Melua)

One Thanksgiving we went around the table and said what we were most grateful for. My answer was simple- I am grateful to be the mother of my two children and daughter of my Dad.

Happy Birthday, Daddy. One day we'll all be home-and never be sad again.

Love,
Taffy

P.S. Thanks for the nickname!